This month I had the privilege of attending a National “Fly-in” in Washington DC. I accompanied my husband and dozens of paving contractors to the Capitol in order to encourage members of congress to support and approve funding for the infrastructure bill. I only had one job, and it was to observe and listen. It isn’t often that I am asked to be quiet, but on this particular day while rushing from senators’ offices to the offices of our congressmen, in one of the busiest places in our country, where everyone has an opinion, I got to play the role of the fly on the wall; I was fascinated. I witnessed the contractors poignantly express the urgency to invest in highways and I watched the elected officials calculate. Because I did not need to spend anytime constructing a reaction, I saw very clearly who cared about our plight and who didn’t. I saw congressmen tolerate the appointments with no intention of supporting our cause because they had their own passion projects and I noted when one congressman met and matched our zeal for the infrastructure bill. When our day on the hill was finished, I was able to clearly synopsize for the group who I believed had their back and who clearly did not. I got a clear picture because I shut up and listened.
I am learning to listen, and I have a lot of learning to do. I really can’t tell you how many times I have heard one of my exasperated children say, “Mom, I told you that already”, or “Mom, don’t you remember? I reminded you 3 times this week!”. I am guilty of tuning them out while I busy around my kitchen or only give them partial attention while I try to catch the headlines on the nightly news. I also am guilty of simply enduring their prattle (and I use the word “prattle” intentionally. They are teenagers, for goodness sake) while I create arguments and teaching analogies to make a strong point to manipulate their decision-making. In all of these examples, I am blatantly guilty of not listening.
The most frustrating pattern in my life as a non-listener is in my relationship with the Lord. Every morning, before I go to Him in prayer or journal or read my Bible, I try to spend 10-15 minutes totally quiet and listening. Every morning, I end up filling the space with distracting thoughts, expressions of guilt, and to-do lists. That “still, quiet space” that everyone’s spirit needs is very small in my very busy day. When I am quiet and I am disciplined enough to shut up and listen, I receive so much blessing. Those precious moments are intimate and nourishing and they require humility and discipline.
Jesus was much busier than I am and He had a whole lot more to say, but He made quiet time before the Lord His priority. He was God and knew The Father better than anyone and yet He wouldn’t go a day without being quiet and committing Himself to that sacred silent time.
The practice of shutting up and listening does not come naturally to us, but just because it is difficult is no reason to give up. The greatest blessings almost always seem to come from the more challenging lessons. As I am learning to listen, I have found that all my discipline and good intentions of trying to be quiet are not enough. I must humble myself and admit to the Lord how big a struggle this is for me. He already knows it and has provided me a helper in the Holy Spirit to encourage me and guide me. Our evil and clever enemy wants nothing more than to keep us from really getting to know God. He is great at distraction and confusion and guilt and He knows the danger his mission is in when we get intimate with the one who will crush his head.
Dear friends, learn with me how to shut up and listen. We will be so blessed as we let go of all our self-importance and invest in getting to know the people in our midst. We will be so blessed when we stop and listen to our kids. Our kids have things to say and as experienced and as seasoned as we are, our kids really can teach us a thing or two. We also have the benefit of knowing how to pray for them and guide them if we really are aware of what their concerns, questions and passions are. Lastly, we will be so richly blessed if we shut up and listen during our time with the Lord. He loves us, and he wants to hear what we have to say, but y’all…. He already knows. He knows our minds and hearts; He created them. As much as we have to say to Him or praise Him for, we have that much more to get to know about Him. Be disciplined to prioritize this still and quiet space with the King of Kings. Be blessed to let Him reveal Himself to you.
“It is funny how mortals always picture us as putting things into their minds: in reality our best work is done by keeping things out.”
― C.S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters
“My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.” John 10:27 (NIV)
“She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said.” Luke 10:39 (NIV)
Dear friends, as always, I would love to know what you think. How have you learned to make listening a priority… with accquaintances, your kids and the Lord? Thank you. XO c
Thank you for the reminder! I was making it a point everyday to quite the mind. Reading your article has made me think twice instead of saying I am to tired to shut up and listen. I will shut up and listen when ever needed. It is very refreshing to just sit quietly. Thank you again for being the teacher!!! I need articles like yours to keep me in check when ego tries to get involved to take oneself off the path!!! Much love and many blessings for all you do!!!
Richard, You are exactly right. Listening brings refreshment and wisdom. Thank you for learning this lesson with me.
Beautiful words and worthwhile point that you make. Why is it many of us are so uncomfortable with quiet stillness when we have those rare opportunities to just be with Him and try our best to listen? I always seem to try to fill those fleeting moments with recurring tasks or flimsy distractions. Thanks so much for the reminder and encouragement to work on this – even when it seems awkward or unsuccessful, you are totally right that it’s worth the effort.
Oh Melanie, Thank you. It is such an encouragement to hear from women like you who are learning the same lessons. We miss you. Hope you are doing well. XO c
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