I walk crooked. When I don’t pay attention to my stride or if I am tired, my heel will strike my inner ankle. After a long jog, my socks are stained with blood on both inner ankles. Some of my tall shoes have chunks missing from repetitive strikes and the dark scars on my ankles are permanent. You would think I would learn. It really hurts to repetitively bang and kick your ankle. A more discerning person would embrace these kicks as self-correcting mistakes and then never kick herself again.
I wish I could say that I am a person who only has to make a mistake once in order to learn. I am not. I am sure that the lion’s share of my mistakes are parenting mistakes. Today marks 20 years for me as a parent. I have messed up a lot of things as a mom, and thankfully, I have learned from a lot of these mistakes. I always intend on being a good mom. I want to inspire and encourage and teach, mold and love my kids in the best ways possible. I have read books and listened to lectures and prayed for guidance, and my kids seem to be doing OK, but they have had to forgive me for a lot too. As much as I love all four of my kids and as great as my intentions are, I am a sinner and an imperfect parent.
As I have made parenting mistakes, I have learned from them. The structure and environment that the 4th child is living in has dramatically evolved from what it was for my first-born. When your best intentions fail and wound, it is only prudent to scrap the original plan and readjust. I have found that the easiest way for me to screw things up is when I am tired, confused, or not paying attention.
We all get tired. Life is exhausting and confusing. When we get distracted, it is so easy to get off track. I am navigating something right now that is uncomfortable, painful and confusing. I know that I need direction and help if I am going to be able to glorify the Lord and keep a sure footing. I need Him to help me establish a plan.
Because life, learning, relationships and parenting are all tough tasks, we need direction and help in our preparation to tackle them. When we are tired, emotionally raw, confused or distracted, we need to have an established plan in place.
It is vital to be in relationship with the Lord. I need time alone with Him. I crave His word, comfort, counsel and direction. I need Him to establish my words, work and steps. On my own, I fall into a pattern of pain and confusion. When I go out unprepared, emotions, confusion and exhaustion distract me. I need a plan in place. I need established steps. I am told that God will provide these, but I need to spend time with Him so I can understand His plan.
It doesn’t take long to figure out that going solo is a self-correcting mistake. You are not perfect and you can recover from your mistakes. You have a friend and leader who can set your feet on the right path and establish your steps. He is the only perfect parent. He has been at it much longer than 20 years. He is eternal. Nothing surprises Him. He is wisdom and truth and peace. He longs to spend time with you and help you establish a plan for navigating through the obstacles in your path. Trust Him. He is gentle and will always pick you up when you fall. He promises to establish your steps.
“A psalm of David. When he was in the Desert of Judah. You, God, are my God, earnestly I seek you; I thirst for you, my whole being longs for you, in a dry and parched land where there is no water.” Psalm 63:1 (NIV)
“Now may our Lord Jesus Christ Himself, and our God and Father, who has loved us and given us everlasting consolation and good hope by grace, comfort your hearts and establish you in every good word and work.”
2 Thessalonians 2:16-17 (NKJV)