Radical and Irrational

In the last few weeks, I have had a couple people ask me why I have not been sharing any new blog posts. The answer is pretty simple. My brain is so full and although I am in a season of intense learning, I am ashamed that I am failing in something so central to the Christian faith. I don’t seem to ever get a break from this lesson. This week I have been given 3 teaching opportunities; the lessons I have been assigned are on “Forgiveness”, “Suffering”, and “Love that never fails”. As I prepare, I have been grieved by my failure in each of these areas.

Easter was just a few days ago. I cried tears of joy and thankfulness for my salvation. My hope is secure because my sins are forgiven. I want to live like Jesus lived, love like He does and forgive just like He has forgiven me, but I fall so short. The truth is, I really really want to obey. I have sought advice from wise, Christian counselors. I have prayed and studied and checked every box on every list I have been given on what I need to do. I find a modicum of peace in my willing spirit, obedience and all the checked boxes, but as soon as I think I might be over the hump, I am reminded of the injustice I suffered and I get all riled up again.

In my personal study time, I have been working through the most boring stretch of books in the Bible. I cannot wait to get out of Exodus, Numbers and Leviticus. These books are full of lists and laws. God, through Moses, shares tons of specific and rigorous rules that must be followed for the Israelites to have fellowship with God. These laws were clear, absolute and the only way until Jesus came and introduced a new and merciful new way. I understand how it must have been so hard for the religious leaders to embrace Jesus’s radical and irrational new way. With my love for rules and box-checking, I am pretty sure that I would have made a pretty good Pharisee.

The radical and irrational truth is that Jesus did change everything. Rule following has its merits, but those merits only produce moral people. When we embrace Jesus instead of rules and morality, we become sanctified. The lesson I keep having to learn is that I can’t do it. I can pretend to be good, but I am just not good. I can say I’m sorry and ask for forgiveness. I can do the right thing, check the box, bake the pie, but on my own, I will fail. I can fool a lot of people and be sweet and contribute to a peaceful atmosphere, but we were all meant for something more. Morality and sweetness is the equivalent of taking a knife to a gunfight; knives and guns are effective tools, but they fall egregiously short when juxtaposed with true ammunition. Jesus knew that in this sinful world we would need the big guns. He gave us His powerful Holy Spirit to help us be what we could never be on our own. We can love and forgive radically and irrationally. I am weak and I am a moral failure and I am so thankful for this realization. I need Jesus. I need Him every minute of every hour. When I am weak, He is strong and His strength is glorified in my weakness. It makes no sense that He would choose me and forgive me and die for me. It is radical and irrational, and because of His radical love and irrational new way, I can do anything. Oh dear friends, rejoice. He is risen, indeed. Please pray with me that in my life He would increase and I would decrease. … Wouldn’t that be radical?!

“Remain in me, and I will remain in you. For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful unless you remain in me. “Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.”

John 15:4-5 (NLT)

 “And I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature.[a] I want to do what is right, but I can’t.” Romans 7:18 (NLT)