Dear Bess,
Gosh! I miss you so much. It’s been 3 months since I hugged your neck and I ache for you. It broke my heart this week to hear about your bad day and how homesick you are. I cannot wait to get you home for Christmas. You were on my mind as I had my quiet time this morning (That isn’t really a surprise :/), but as I prayed and studied my bible, I landed on Psalm 136.
I have been wrestling with sleep like you have, and as I consistently wake up in the middle of the night, I have been praying (mostly about one thing that God seems to be really delaying on) for hours and hours every night. I realized or… was more accurately convicted by the Holy Spirit…. That I have been praying wrong. I say that I trust the Lord with all my heart, but in reality, I have not been doing that. I have been relying on my own understanding and I have been swimming in anxiety and confusion as I fixate on this problem. I feel like I need to keep pushing the prayer or changing up the words or tweaking what an acceptable outcome would be. I’m pretty sure that in praying this way, I have been holding on to this mess instead of actually trusting the Lord with it. I know God heard my prayer and I know He is the only one who can make this broken mess beautiful. So, anyway…. I read Psalm 136 this morning. The author of this psalm talks about the plagues in Egypt and Pharaoh’s pursuit of the Israelites through the Red Sea. He remembers the persecution they all received from evil kings and from evil neighbors. He recalls their need for land and shelter and food and safety. He doesn’t leave out how weak and needy they all are. I am sure that with every single one of these major struggles, the Israelites asked God for His help. They feared God and knew only He could save them, but Psalm 136 isn’t a psalm of petitions… It’s a psalm of repetitive praise. Every other line… for 26 verses…. This phrase is repeated: “His faithful love endures forever”.
Dear Bess, God is faithful. He knows your heartache and all your needs. He has heard your prayers and He has heard all of mine. We are part of forever and we too should pray songs of thankfulness as we remember His goodness and faithfulness in our lives. We are told and even commanded all through scripture to Praise HIM! We are to praise Him without ceasing. This is a righteous effective prayer. I know that I am not a bible scholar, but I can’t remember reading in scripture that we are supposed to ceaselessly petition God for the same thing over and over again. God hears us the first time. He knows the desire of our hearts and He is the one who heals. He’s got this! Praise Him. He is faithful His faithful love endures forever.
Dear Bess, next time that you find yourself anxious and worried in the middle of the night, model a prayer of praise with reminders from your own life of How God has been faithful to you. As I lay awake, 1,000’s of miles away, I will be praying a song of praise with you and for you. Here is mine today:
Give Thanks to the Lord, for He is good.
His faithful love endures forever.
Give thanks to God who always hears my prayers.
His faithful love endures forever.
He sent His only son to die for me.
His faithful love endures forever.
He gave me a hunger for His word
His faithful love endures forever.
He is the captain of heaven’s armies.
His faithful love endures forever.
He is coming again soon to take me home.
His faithful love endures forever.
He fulfilled my longing to be a wife. Thanks be to God for Pat!
His faithful love endures forever.
He blessed me by giving me a first-born, beautiful daughter who has grown into a woman of excellence and beauty. Thank you God for Bess.
His faithful love endures forever.
He blessed me with a strong son and healed him from the weaknesses of a premature birth. Thank you God for David.
His faithful love endures forever.
He blessed me with a second beautiful daughter who brings joy to all around her. Thank you God for Catey.
His faithful love endures forever.
He blessed me with the exquisite joy of being an adoptive mom. He showed me the miracle of rescue and new life. Thank you God for Mary Moore.
His faithful love endures forever.
He placed me in a home with loving and wise, God-fearing parents and a bunch of fantastic siblings.
His faithful love endures forever.
He has healed sickness and disease in our family.
His faithful love endures forever.
He has placed us in Memphis_ a city that is filled with hope and opportunities and family and friends and great schools and 4 distinct seasons.
His faithful love endures forever.
He led us to 2PC where we have grown and can serve and learn and rejoice in worship.
His faithful love endures forever.
For the silly laughter that fills our home because of Kevin and all her ridiculous ways.
His faithful love endures forever.
He gives us great food and good health and sharp minds.
His faithful love endures forever.
Give thanks to the God of Heaven!
His faithful love endures forever.
I Love you Bess! See you soon. XOXOXO Mom