Agape Love Archives - Page 8 of 8 - Catherine Nelson

I have spent a lot of time traveling recently and have noticed bits of drama in many airports. Rushed connections, late arrivals, crying babies, romantic reunions and overcrowding make for colorful expeditions. Last week, I watched the drama unfold in an airport Starbucks. I was in the middle of a 10 person line, waiting for my $4 “fake” coffee, when a frantic teenage girl rushed up and started asking everyone if she could go ahead of us, because she was about to miss her flight. A very big man in a muscle-bearing T-shirt walked up at the same time and just shook his head, mumbling under his breath and shaming her. She quickly made it to the front, bought a banana, water and a coffee and raced away down the hall. A little old lady in our line said, “I sure hope she makes her flight”….. and then mumbling/shaming/muscle dude went on a rant. He said that her flight was closing its doors when she asked the flight attendant if she had time to go get a Starbucks. The flight attendant discouraged her, but apparently told her she had 3 minutes. Mumbling/shaming /muscle dude made an impassioned F-bomb laced, loud speech about the idiocy of risking a $500 flight for a cup of coffee, and then the little old lady hushed us all by looking muscle dude straight in the face and said, “Sir, we know nothing about her. She may be a diabetic. All we know is that she really needed that banana and coffee.” The little old lady showed us all the strength of mercy and made a much stronger impression than muscle man.

The coffee and banana-seeking teenager may have been a diabetic or maybe she was just foolish enough to risk a flight for a coffee, but the point is, we didn’t know. We don’t know much at all about many of the people we encounter daily. We may think the well-dressed executive who never shuts up is a pompous snob, or he just may talk about himself a lot because he is very insecure. We may think the happy mom leading around her immaculate children in smocked dresses has it all together, but she may be broken and suffering deeply. We certainly don’t know the history and intimate details of the panderers at our major intersections. If we do not take the time to get to know people, we have no right or reason to make assumptions on their life. We are called to be in relationship, to love the unlovely, to minister to the poor and sick. It takes strength to show mercy. It seems to me that we all need to assume less, listen more and treat everyone with the compassion we crave to receive. When we feel too busy or too weak to help, we have the privilege of calling on the God of all mercy and love to fill us up, so that there is overflow for even the strangers we encounter at Starbucks. This is the strength of mercy. Be strong, my precious friends.

 “I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength to do his work. He considered me trustworthy and appointed me to serve him” 1 Timothy 1:12 (NLT)

 

“Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets.” Matthew 7:12 (NLT)

Pat and I spent last weekend attending a church officers’ retreat at Pickwick. We laughed a lot and learned a lot and we were incredibly blessed by the wisdom and encouragement shared with us by Andy Lewis. On Sunday morning of the retreat, we were gathering to share communion and worship, and as the ministers set up the communion table, they didn’t have any matches to light the candles. I was seated in the front, so I opened my tiny purse and shared the box of matches I had inside of it…. And then was teased (in a truly funny and good-natured way) for being a smoker. I am not a smoker and haven’t been for over 20 years, but I won’t pretend for a second that I wasn’t. In my past, I have also been a marathon runner, tennis player, thespian, insecure teenager, boozy college student, bungee jumper and cat owner, and none of those things are true about me now. I can say with almost total certainty that none of those things will be true about me in the future. They are part of my story. I am embarrassed by some of these things and proud of others, but they all have worked together to shape who I am today. Today, I am a wife and a mother and a writer and a gardener, a pretty good cook, and I am a passionate student of God’s word. There are many of us who are so burdened by our past or absorbed in our past accomplishments that we are inhibited in moving forward. I certainly had anxiety in launching a website as I thought of people who only knew me in high school or college reading my blogs. There are also many of us that are so worried about the future that we allow anxiety to siphon out our present joy. We don’t take a step forward because of what might be hiding around the next corner or the possibility of failing. The liberating and happy truth is that we are told to live today, rejoice today and learn today. Today may be the hardest season of your life, but as awful as your circumstances are, there are thousands of great things about your life today that you can set your mind on. We are told to set our minds on what is true today.

“And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.” Phil. 4:8 (NLT)

The enemy will whisper, “I know you. You are dishonorable and dirty and unlovely and should be ashamed. Reject these lies. Precious friends, do you know what is true about you today? If you love Jesus, you are a new creation. Claim Phil 4:8. Rejoice in what is true today and then praise your excellent Lord for who he is and all the freedom that comes with claiming this truth.

I have watched the Today Show ever since I was in high school. I’m always awake before it comes on  and if I haven’t had my quiet time before 7, I hit the pause button on my DVR, so I don’t miss anything. I really enjoy it. It is part of my routine and shamefully, how I get almost all of my news. The events covered in the first ½ hour are usually devastating, and as I learn of the turmoil in Israel or destructive weather or plane crashes, or Ebola virus epidemics, I am thankful for the lack of devastation in my life, but also ashamed of the personal requests I petition the Lord for. There have been seasons of devastation in my life and in yours, but during the easier seasons, when just getting through the day doesn’t seem as difficult, I still have prayer requests. I have always known that God loves each of us, knows our hearts and cares about our needs, but it seems selfish to pray for a temporary outcome when so many are suffering.

I was really encouraged today as I read the account in Luke 5 when Jesus preformed a miracle on Peter’s boat. Although Peter had not caught any fish all night, Jesus told him to try again. Peter obeyed and when he let his nets out again, he caught so many fish that the nets began to tear. What happened next was where I found the encouragement. Peter knew that Jesus had healed diseases and had cast out demons, but the fish catching miracle allowed Peter to see that Jesus cared about his day-to-day routine.

 “When Simon Peter realized what had happened, he fell to his knees before Jesus and said, ‘O Lord, please leave me-I’m too much of a sinner to be around you.” For he was awestruck by the number of fish they had caught.” Luke 5:8-9 (NLT)

God is so big. He loves us so much. He collects all our tears. He aches for all the suffering happening all over this world He created, and He tells us that we should care deeply about it too. When our friends, family, neighbors, missionaries or strangers are suffering, we can and should pray. We also can and should pray for God’s help and direction in our daily routines. The life he appointed for us today is not insignificant to Him, and even though it can seem pretty routine, it is foolishness to think we can handle it on our own. He listens to all our prayers, and He can be glorified in everything we do. It is such a privilege to give Him the glory.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart;
    do not depend on your own understanding.Seek his will in all you do,
 and he will show you which path to take.” Prov 3:5-6 (NLT)

I don’t like being trendy. I am irritated that a local NBC news reporter and Miranda Lambert got my haircut this week. I feel absurd that my food allergy falls into the latest diet fad and has its own special isle at every Kroger. I took a face book quiz this week to find out what high school stereotype I was, and to my chagrin, I got “the normal kid”. (UGGGHHHHH!) We live in a society that gives labels to everyone and everything, and I don’t think anyone wants to be labeled as trendy or normal. We want to be seen as individual and special. I grew up in a family with 5 kids. The other 4 were labeled as the “pretty one”, the “smart one”, the athlete”, and the “talented one”. I was the “nice one”. I hated my label. I’m pretty sure my siblings hated their labels too. We all had gifts and loathed the pigeonhole of a 1 dimensional label.

About a decade ago, I had a conversation with one of my siblings about what God sees when He looks at us. In my vanity and foolishness, I told her that I was so glad that Jesus died for my sins and that God has clothed me with a robe of righteousness, but I really hoped that the robe would let my head stick out. I was glad that God saw Jesus when he looked at me, but I said that I feel pretty great about myself and I really wanted God to see ME too. Oh, what an idiot I was! As I have grown to love God and Jesus and the Holy Spirit more, I have seen that the best label for me without that robe is “Wicked”, “Gross”, and “Awful”. I recently hear D.A. Carson say, “There is no room for arrogance next to the cross.”

Today, I don’t want that beautiful white robe of righteousness to stop at my neck, but I wish it would cover my whole head, my whole…..everything, and the beautiful truth is that it does. God sees his beautiful son Jesus when He looks at me, because Jesus stands right there for me. I am labeled perfect and forgiven. God looks at me and because of Jesus, God says, “This is my kid. She is beautiful and I delight in her.” If you love Jesus, He says this about you too. We are dressed the same in a beautiful white robe of righteousness, and the only label that matters is that we are children of the King.

“After this I looked, and there before me was a great multitude that no one could count, from every nation, tribe, people and language, standing before the throne and before the Lamb. They were wearing white robes and were holding palm branches in their hands.” Revelation 7:9 (NIV)

“Preserve me, O God, for in you I take refuge.

I say to the Lord, “You are my Lord;
 I have no good apart from you.” Psalm 16:1-2 (ESV)

“Attention Ladies and Gentlemen, this Delta flight today is peanut-free”.

This announcement preceded all the other announcements on one of my recent flights. On our flight was an unaccompanied minor who was fatally allergic to peanuts and therefore, none of us would receive the tiny packets of peanuts that I always look forward to, nor could anyone open up their PB&J’s or Nutter Butters, or peanut M&M’s. There would be zero tolerance of peanuts of any sort on this flight. This announcement was serious. No one wanted to witness or contribute to the horror of an unaccompanied minor going into anaphylactic shock while trapped on a plane 30,000 feet above the ground. It was a life or death issue and everyone appreciated the severity of this allergy. This warning was a new one to me, but only new in its specificity and location.

We get warnings all the time concerning things that can kill. Don’t smoke. Stay out of the sun. Don’t text and drive. “Don’t drink, don’t chew, don’t go with girls who do.”. We have learned what is dangerous and what can kill us and we change our habits and guide our children to stay off of these fatal paths. I am quite certain that none of you take your young children to tanning beds. We see the statistics and believe in the results, and so we adhere to the new course, but I wonder why we (esp. Catherine) are not equally as vigilant to close the proverbial airplane door to sin in our lives. Have we not been warned?

Jesus said in Matthew 5:29 (NIV) “If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.

Of course, I realize that we are not to go and gouge our eyes out, but why don’t we see sin for the fatal toxin that it is? Worse than a peanut to an allergic child, we consume sin and let it dizzy us, cloud our vision, make us sick and faint, nauseate us, irritate us like a rash, take the wind out of our lungs, unbalance our heartbeat and slowly choke us. We can recognize our sin as easily as we can recognize a peanut, but have we become so anesthetized to God’s grace and patience that we don’t see the danger of our sin? We must not even allow it in the door. We are all going to sin and fail and fail again until we are in heaven and perfect like Jesus, but until that day, this same Jesus has given us the eyes to see our sin and the power to overcome it. In his grace and mercy, Jesus reveals it to us and only by his grace are we able to turn from it. Oh how I pray that I would be as allergic to sin as that child is to peanuts. I know that while I am sojourning here, the father who set me on this journey has not left me unaccompanied. He is with me and will continue to help me recognize the danger and give me the victory to overcome

Before dinner last night, we asked one of our teenagers to ask the blessing for our food. It was a pretty standard, straight to the point blessing, and as she closed, she rushed through the phrase, “In Jesus’s name, Amen” without a breath or pause. In listening to her lack of thought, I was convicted about my own response to the name of Jesus.

Jesus is the Son of God. His death on the cross gave me life. He took on all of my sins. He gave me the full measure of himself in the Holy Spirit. Through the power of his name, miracles happen and blessings abound. His name offends and delivers peace. It is only through the name of Jesus that we can approach the throne of God. There is power in the name of Jesus and it is his name that makes our prayers powerful. One day every knee will bow and tongue will confess that He is Lord. Oh the praise and glory that we should offer in the name of Jesus.

I have the huge responsibility of setting an example for my children. I am certain that my own rushed prayers set the model for the style of prayer that I heard at our table last night. I am so thankful for the wake up call that prayer gave me, and for the grace that covers my poor example. I am also so very thankful that God uses my children to teach me lessons all the time as He does the exhaustive work of sanctifying me.

All hail the power of Jesus’ name!
Let angels prostrate fall;
bring forth the royal diadem,
and crown him Lord of all. Edward Perronet 1779

“For He who is mighty has done great things for me,And holy is His name.” Luke 1:49 (NKJV)

For a long time, I was shackled to an addiction. In every sense of the definition, my addiction became an idol. I thought about it often. I kept it a secret and it stole my peace and joy. It also offered a level of comfort and satisfaction that I had been fooled into believing I needed. I convinced myself that it wasn’t a big deal, because it specifically had never been preached on, featured in a news story or profiled in a documentary on TLC. Most of you would have told me it was no big deal, because indulging in it didn’t hurt anyone, BUT….It was a big deal, because I recognized the hold it had on me and I chose not to do anything about it. I believed I needed it. I convinced myself that it didn’t really matter to God…. BUT, sin is a big deal to God and when we recognize sin in our lives and don’t turn from it, that separates us from intimacy with Him, and in the words of Nemo, “that is a really big But(t)!”

Our adversary, the devil is brilliant. He is so good at filling our minds with lies. He distracts us from the truth and inoculates us by minimizing the destructiveness of idol worship. Tim Keller defines idolatry as “anything that absorbs your heart and imagination more than God, anything you seek to give you what only God can give…”

Idols are addictive and can take almost any form. Idols in any form are as useless as scarecrows in a cucumber field. Jer. 10:5.

Jeremiah 10 is all about idolatry and its destructiveness. If you are struggling with something you are aware is an idol, take 5 minutes to read this chapter and see how destructive idols can be, and recognize that “The God of Israel is no Idol! He is the creator of everything that exists, including Israel (and YOU), his own special possession. The Lord of Heaven’s armies is his name.” Jer 10:16. Your God is a mighty warrior and leads heaven’s armies in this battle. You are His special possession and you are worth fighting for!

I am so very thankful that the Holy Spirit has been relentless in showing me truth. As much as Satan tries to minimize the destructive nature of my behavior, God in his mercy opens my ears to the prodding of his Spirit and my heart when I study His word. He is worthy to be praised and the only one worth worshiping.

So, Why are scarecrows in a cucumber field useless? The reason for having a scarecrow in a garden is to scare off the crows. Crows see the vegetables and swoop down to eat them, but crows cannot see the cucumbers. Cucumbers are one of the few things that I grow, and their leaves are huge. These leaves serve as a canopy that hide all the cucumbers. From the vantage point of a crow, my garden is a bunch of big leaves. Crows aren’t tempted to eat leaves, and so there is no need to scare them off. Any idol in your life is a pretender. It seems important to you, but if you remove it, you will find that God has already provided something much more effective in its place. Take the stupid scarecrow off its throne and worship the Lord of Heaven’s army!

About a year ago, Pat and I had the opportunity to climb a mountain. It was grueling and exhausting and exciting. As we climbed, there were sections of the mountain that He would have to hoist me up, because I could not find a foothold. The further we went, the harder it was to breathe and we had to rest and hydrate more. When we finished the climb and enjoyed the view, I knew I could not have made it without him.

This year, I have been climbing a figurative mountain. It has been grueling and with every step I strain to see the pinnacle and pine to be finished. I have had a climbing buddy to encourage and march along with me. She has been by my side as we hoisted each other up and rested and hydrated on God’s word. This week, she was removed from the mountain. As her figurative rescue helicopter swooped in, I was left alone, and as happy as I am for her to have finished, the isolation and journey ahead without her is painful.

After having a pretty grand pity party, and after I wiped my tears and got on my knees, I was so encouraged by the only ONE who will never leave me. I had been finding my confidence and comfort in my climbing buddy instead of the one who created the Mountain. I need HIM every step of the climb. I cannot make it without him.

Oh sweet friends, we are all climbing mountains. The creator who fashioned the mountains also fashioned you. You are fearfully and wonderfully made and you are never alone. He calls you His beloved! Keep marching. Hydrate on his word. Rest in the safety of His everlasting arms. Rejoice in the shadow of his wings. You may be tempted to quit or give up, but remember this:

“The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure.” 1 Cor. 10:13. (NLT)

Earlier this year, I hurt someone I love very deeply. The wound I caused was unintentional, but it came from a selfish place in my life. As innocent as I felt that my actions were, the effect they had was devastating, and I am responsible for those actions. For the better part of a year, I have done all I know to do to repent and repair the relationship, but my exhaustive efforts have all been rejected. The person I hurt had been hurt many times before by others in a similar fashion and was raw and vulnerable to be immensely wounded by my new contribution to his/her long-standing ache. I have worried and wept and grieved over the gulch I helped create.

I have been greatly humbled and isolated by my sin, and have sought counsel and God’s direction about what to do now. The freeze in this relationship has not changed, but so much else has. God has been doing quite a number on my heart. When someone refuses to forgive you, you experience a major slap of rejection. Everything you have to offer (love, friendship, your gifts and talents, etc.) isn’t enough, acceptable or attractive. You feel like you are an expendable nothing and you begin to build your own sense of pride and resentment.

Our God, who never rests and is always working, has been teaching me forgiveness and patience and trust and how to love someone who doesn’t love you back.

I have been really comforted by looking at some close and stressed-out relationships in Genesis. Isaac and Ishmael, Jacob and Esau, and Joseph and his brothers were all designed to be very close, family relationships, but in each case, one brother sinned against another and there was a devastating wound that led to decades of isolation and rejection.

Ishmael and His mother left the toxicity in their home with Abraham, Sarah and Isaac to live in the wilderness where Ishmael grew up to become an expert with the bow, marry an Egyptian and start a new nation. During this time Isaac married Rebekah and fathered two boys, as He became a patriarch of a new nation. Their separation was harsh, but we know they reconciled even if only briefly to bury their father, Abraham. (Gen 25:9)

Jacob and Esau’s relationship came to a boiling point when Jacob deceived his father over a birthright blessing and Esau threatened to kill him. Jacob fled and during His time of separation, married Leah and Rachel, had lots of children and became a successful farmer and shepherd. After a 20-year separation, Jacob travels toward home where He will have to encounter Esau. Esau

“ran to meet him, embraced him, fell on his neck and kissed him and they wept.” (Gen 33:4- NIV)

Joseph’s brothers sold him into slavery and assumed He was dead. In the 20 years they were apart, the brothers continued to farm and grow their families, while Joseph rose in leadership until he was the 2nd most powerful man in the world. At their face-to-face reunion,

Joseph “kissed all his brothers and wept upon them.” (Gen 45:15 NIV).

In each of these relationships, one brother sinned against another, but in the end, there was reconciliation. If you, like me, have wounded someone you love, make sure you have done all you possibly can to repair, repent, forgive and reconcile, but if you are rejected, take comfort. You are learning patience, and patience produces character and character produces hope (Romans 5:4). God is all about reconciliation. He has reconciled us all to himself through Jesus Christ. He loves you and He knows what He is doing. His thoughts are not your thoughts and His ways are higher than your ways. (Is 55:8-9)

As for today, keep busy doing kingdom work. Trust and Obey. God’s timing is perfect. Waiting for reconciliation can be exhausting, but reconciliation is a great thing and the hope for it comes from our great God.

”But do not let this one fact escape your notice, beloved, that with the Lord one day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years like one day. 9The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you…” 2 Peter 3:8-9 (NKJV)

Wolves, by nature, are predators. They attack sheep. It is foolishness to hate a wolf for being a wolf and it is equally foolish to allow a wolf into a sheep pen.

Over the winter break, my children exposed me to the game, “Trivia Crack”. I have really enjoyed playing and have found it to be as addictive as its name suggests. One of the latest history questions I was given was to finish this Martin Luther King quote:

            “In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of…”

One of the multiple-choice answers was, “Their souls”.

Although incorrect, this was a great answer. It seemed totally fitting that a man so focused on peace would show mercy to his enemies by realizing that the harsh and vicious words from the mouths of his enemies were the manifestations of a sickness of the soul. When souls and hearts are not filled with love, it is only natural for hateful words and lies to come spewing out.

We live in a world full of enemies and wolves that attack, slash and growl. There will always be wolves, but it is wasted energy to hate the wolf for being a wolf. We should hate how the wolf bites, wounds and attacks the lamb, but what is the point in hating the wolf? The wolf is only following its natural instinct. In the same manner, we should hate the sin while loving the sinner. Healing begins by NOT remembering the words of our enemies. We cannot let false accusations and threats define who we are or steal our joy.

I read a post on Facebook recently that dealt with the process of forgiveness. Craig Strickland, the founding pastor at Hope Presbyterian Church in Memphis said this:

I’m struck by the fact that a lot of us have people living rent free in our heads. Somebody has done something so wrong to you that there is no way to make it right: an apology, jail time, making amends, reimbursing you …nothing will make you whole. So you think about their heinous crime all the time. They’re living rent free in your head…. Forgiving another person means ‘letting them go’-not because they deserve it but because it’s the best way to be free of them. And don’t think you can say, “I forgive you” once and then you’re over it. You’ll probably have to say it over and over…and like the waves on the beach, you’ll feel free a little at a time. Eventually they won’t live rent free in your head anymore. And don’t confuse forgiveness with trust. You can forgive and still not trust the person who has wronged you.

We forgive because we are forgiven, and we move on. We learn from adversity, but we don’t have to immerse ourselves in it. For the safety of the sheep, the shepherd keeps them away from the wolves. A loving shepherd never asks a sheep to set up a little sheep hut next to a wolf’s den.

The apostle Paul, who suffered all kinds of attacks and persecution, was a champion of rejoicing through suffering. He glorified the Lord while languishing through beatings, imprisonment, mockery, snakebites and shipwrecks, but I am sure that he never stood in a ship yard while trying to figure out which boat to board and said, “Hey. Put me on the worst boat with lots of broken beams and holes. Be sure I am chained up on it with baton bearing thugs who hate me…. And while you’re at it, throw some poisonous snakes in the basement with me.”. Paul rejoiced in his appointment to suffer, but he never foolishly went out looking for danger.

When we have been put through the ringer and are recovering from the attack of the wolf, there is a beautiful opportunity to reveal our faith and trust in our Great Shepherd. Forgiveness is hard work and when faced with the process of forgiving, I know that it is beyond me to get to that place by sheer will-power. When I try to do what is right or heal my own broken heart, I always end up concentrating on the wolf or on my pain. When I do this, I have a bitter and wounded countenance.

When I let go of my pain and allow Jesus to mend and heal, I can see the path to joy. When I live by faith and trust God with my situation, I am much quicker to understand peace. When I cry out, “Abba, Father”, I know He listens, heals, protects, and delights in my prayer. The Shepherd knows that the lamb is defenseless against the wolf. The Shepherd is the only one capable of protecting the lamb. With Jesus as my shepherd, I can move forward knowing that the beauty of God is on me and that He will establish the work my heart needs to cultivate in my longing for forgiveness.

We are all called to forgive. I am confident that everyone reading this has found forgiveness to be a challenge. We are guaranteed victory. Because we have been forgiven, we are being conformed to Christ. We do not have to “remember the words of our enemies”. We must remember how much we have been forgiven.

“And let the beauty of the Lord our God be upon us, 
And establish the work of our hands for us; 
Yes, establish the work of our hands.” Psalm 90:17 (NKJV)

“…The Spirit of glory and of God rests upon you…” 1 Peter 4:14 (NKJV)

“…Work out your OWN salvation with fear and trembling; for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure.” Philippians 2:12-13 (NKJV)