Friends and Fifty Shades

Everyone is talking about, blogging about and going to see Fifty Shades of Grey. Christian bloggers are verbose and pervasive in their Fifty Shades bashing. My favorite 4-screen, small, artistic movie theater has gone mainstream and is showing the film on 2 screens. Millions have read it and millions more will watch it. To tell the truth, I dabbled in it. When the book came out in paperback, I bought it while on a vacation. About 6 chapters in, my conscience woke up and I threw it in my hotel trashcan. Ironically, the housekeeping staff must have thought my pitch was a mistake and they retrieved it and placed it on my fluffed bed pillow. Thankfully, they removed it with the trash the following day.

I have not seen the film or finished the book, so I cannot speak with authority on why the film and book is so harmful to our minds and love lives, but I will happily echo the warnings of others.

Because the film is a mainstay in the media this week, I have discussed the harmfulness of the film with my daughters. Pat and I consistently warn them to guard their hearts. By God’s design, they are to be loved and protected and cherished. Like their mom, they are very visual creatures. What we see, sticks. When our emotions get involved, our actions and values evolve. Like my mom used to say, “What’s down in the well comes up in the bucket.”

In our Fifty Shades heart to heart, we also discussed the danger of the show “Friends”. I love the show. I am a Monica. The 22-minute escape into laughter and silliness has given me needed giggles over the last 20 years. Its emergence on Netflix has reintroduced it into our home. I am pretty certain that I have never read negative Christian blogs on the show and I can’t imagine that 100% of my friends don’t enjoy it too. I do think it should come with a strong warning. Friends and Fifty Shades are visually and emotionally enticing. One taps into our libido and the other tickles our funny bone; both hook us emotionally and have the potential to shape our values and actions. They mainstream sex outside of marriage and ridicule the beauty of virginity until marriage. When we are entertained by and binge on these emotionally triggering ideals, we can lose sight of what is really beautiful.

I am not casting stones. I would be lined up so far back at the end of the stone casting line. I just think it is important to be savvy and protective consumers of everything we choose to see. It is so easy to jump on the Fifty Shades bashing bandwagon; it takes a disciplined sense of alertness to be convicted by the offensive when it is wrapped up in humor.

When the girls were little, we used to sing the song, “Be careful little eyes what you see.” The song concludes with these words, “For the Father up above is looking down in love…..” The Father up above loves all of us. He wants us to be careful consumers because He knows what will bring us joy and not harm. He has created incredible beauty and wonder for our consumption. Friends and Fifty Shades are just 2 out of thousands of harmful vision cripplers. We have the opportunity to be proactive. Fill up on the good stuff and you won’t have a hunger for the harmful.

 “Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.” Phil 4:8 (NKJV)